


Family Moments

by Faiz



Category: The Almighty Johnsons
Genre: Family moments, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-28
Updated: 2014-02-22
Packaged: 2017-12-09 20:34:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 14,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/777718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faiz/pseuds/Faiz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabbles and snapshots of the happier times in the Johnson brothers' lives</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Timeout

"Why are we actually listening to Mike though?" Axl mumbled, staring angrily into the wall in the corner he was now sitting in front of.

"Because we fucked up, now shut up, we're not supposed to talk." Ty answered, from his chair on the other side of the room.

It was as if they were kids again. Ty, Axl, and Anders had all suddenly paid a visit to Mike and Valerie, and they had decided to have a 'friendly tussle' in the living room that had absolutely nothing to do with arguing about anything at all. Either way, it had resulted in a vase being smashed after Ty had punched Anders. Anders had flown quite a bit farther than expected and had knocked over a vase that had been sitting there. That's when Mike came in out of nowhere, and he was angry. The three brothers felt like they were little kids again while Mike was yelling at them, and then he had the nerve to even send them into time out exactly as he used to when they were little. Hell, they even had the same spots where they'd always end up in.

Axl was sitting in a corner facing a wall, Ty was sitting in a chair across the room also facing the wall, and Anders was in another chair facing a different corner. They had all complained loudly to Mike that he was treating them like children, but in the end Ty and Anders relented quietly to their chairs. Axl was still mad. He had just become Odin, and even if he wasn't exactly Odin yet without his full powers, he should be able to decide whether or not he'd be sent to some corner like when he was little. He was even more angry at his two older brothers who had resigned to their fate so easily.

"No really, we're all grown adults and our older brother was still able to send us to corners like we're fucking five years old!" Axl slammed his head against the wall.

"Well, you know what Mike said," Anders said without turning around from his own corner. "If we're going to fight like five year olds, we're going to be punished like five year olds. So here we are, stuck in corners. Besides Ty. He's just facing a wall. I always knew he was Mike's favorite." Axl could practically hear the eye roll in his older brother's voice. "Just be glad he didn't decide to hit us with his belt. He did that to me when I was sixteen and came home after curfew and dared argue with him like a 6 year old."

"Is that what that was?" Ty asked, also not turning around. "I just assumed you were into some weird shit back then."

"Haha, very funny." Anders muttered. 

Axl ignored them and groaned loudly. "How long are we going to be here? It's been like an hour! And why didn't I get a chair anyways? I'm the only one sitting on the floor!" 

"You're the youngest. And it's only been five minutes, you can stand ten more can't you?" Anders leaned back on his chair.

"No. No I can't." Axl leaned his head against the wall and muttered. "This is bullshit. You can't ground Odin..."

"You can ground Odin if you're his older brother, apparently." Ty and Anders laughed at him.

Fuck those guys.


	2. Frozen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which it's probably not the best idea to go swimming with the new god of cold and gloom

Ty was a bit jealous of Anders at the moment. Stupid, tiny, fish, Anders. Ty hadn't been in the best of moods ever since he had discovered his new 'godly' powers. Now he was always cold, and always so damn depressed. And now he was sitting at the edge of a pool watching his older brother paddle along in the water like he was part fish or something. Ty felt like he couldn't even get in the pool for fear of accidentally freezing his brothers in it. And Mike and Olaf had specifically told him that Axl was not to know a thing about all this god business until he turned 21. So for now Ty was avoiding touching the water at all, because he didn't have control over his powers quite yet. Anders has been having fun with that, constantly handing him warm beers or melting ice cream. 

At least that was somewhat useful, even if he could no longer enjoy eating hot foods or being warm at all for that matter. And right now he was still accidentally freezing his drinks in his mouth. Thankfully Axl was extraordinarily oblivious to the entire matter. It didn't make it any better though. He just didn't want Anders to be bragging all the time about how at least he could use his powers to get ladies into his bed while all Ty was doing was accidentally freezing things he wasn't supposed to (showers had become a very dangerous thing, and probably will be until he finally gets a hang of his powers.) 

But even if he was so cold, the pool still looked rather inviting. Mike was lounging with Olaf on some pool chairs, while Anders and Axl were having races across the pool, with Anders predictably winning every time. Ty may not be the fish that Anders was, but he was still a strong swimmer. He just didn't want to freeze the water over. It seems like Axl finally got fed up with Anders winning every time, because he had suddenly gotten out and stalked back into the house mumbling to himself.

"Axl is such a sore loser." Anders laughed as he treaded the water. "Aren't you going to come in for a swim, Jack Frost?" Anders turned to look at Ty.

"No. I'm fine. I'm cold enough already, swimming probably won't make it any better." Ty sighed. 

"Okay, your loss little brother." He ducked his head into the water.

Ty watched as Anders broke through the surface, and he looked down into the water. Maybe if he just dipped his feet in, nothing bad would happen? He sat down and scooted closer to the pool before pausing. He looked up to see Olaf and Mike talking to each other, and not paying attention to the pool at all, and Anders was still swimming around. Ty carefully stuck his foot out, and dunked one of his toes into the water. It wasn't actually that cold, or maybe it just wasn't as cold as himself. Well, nothing seemed to have happened, so he stuck his foot in a bit more.

Nothing.

Maybe he was finally gaining control of his powers? Feeling perhaps a bit over confident in his abilities, he plunged both his feet into the water quickly.

"Holy FUCK!" 

Bad idea. Ty quickly pulled his legs out, to see that there was a ring of ice around his legs. And the entire pool was now covered in a layer of ice. He winced slightly, when he realized that Anders was still in the pool, and he panicked as he watched his older brother struggle trying to get out of the ice. He would have laughed, because Anders just looked so goddamn ridiculous stuck in the ice like that, but the water must be really cold, and Ty had caused it. Anders maybe be a resilient little bastard, but even he couldn't combat things like hypothermia, and it'll all be Ty's fault. He wanted to run over and help Mike and Olaf, but he knew if he just touched Anders a bit, it'll make it worse. He was just glad that Axl had gone inside.

"What the fuck were you doing Ty?" Anders was out, and currently being rolled up in way too many towels by Olaf, and Mike had gone over to Ty's side.

"Well...I stuck my feet in the pool?" He felt like an idiot. "Look Mike, I didn't mean to, I thought I could control it..." He trailed off.

Mike sighed. "Well...You might have to wait awhile before you can get into a pool again. Be lucky that Axl wasn't in the pool too, and that Anders seems to be alright." 

Ty nodded, and watched as Anders (now practically just a pile of towels) was carried in by Olaf. "I'll try not to do it again..."

Yes, Ty was so lucky to have been stuck with being the god of gloom and doom. How the hell was he supposed to form any sort of relationship with anyone when there was a chance he'd freeze them to death? Maybe he'd just hole himself up in his room and never leave again. Maybe there was some way to lose your god powers, but he doubted it. He sighed, and bent down to poke his hand in the water again. The water around his hand froze immediately, but he was still able to pull out his hand. 

"Whoa! How the hell did this happen?" Axl had come out again, but instead of being shocked, he seemed to look at the frozen over pool in excitement. "Do you think it's thick enough to go ice skating? We should do it! I'm better at ice skating than Anders!"

Thank goodness Axl was kind of an idiot, or else this could have gone much, much, worse.


	3. The Ceremony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of course Anders ended up being Mike's 'trial run' brother when it came to god ceremonies.

Mike had been checking the duffel bag over and over again since the morning. All the stones were still there, the same as they had been after Mike's own ceremony. Today was Anders' birthday, which meant it was time for his god ceremony, and Mike was nervous as hell. He wished his mother would have given him a bit more explanation, maybe something written down so he wouldn't forget. Even a damn pamphlet would have been helpful! How was he supposed to explain to his younger brother that he was a god? He ran his fingers over the stones again, counting them. He was taking Anders back to the forest under the disguise of a hiking trip. Anders had been against it, but Mike (with Olaf's help, since he had been visiting a few weeks ago) explained that it was a tradition in their family when someone turns twenty one.

So thats why they were currently walking through the forest in a slightly awkward silence. Anders had been slowly breaking apart from their family, and Mike had an odd feeling that as soon as Anders got his god powers, he would just leave as soon as he was physically able to. 

"So what's in the bag that's so important that you keep checking it?" Anders piped up suddenly, looking up at Mike. 

"It's...Nothing important right now. We'll keep going for a bit, and then you'll get to see." Mike said finally, trying to pick his words carefully.

Anders stared at him for a moment, and Mike could tell he was contemplating whether or not he should bug Mike for the answer. But he finally relented with an 'okay', and they continued onward for a few miles until they reached the familiar clearing where Mike had his own ceremony just four years previously. Mike couldn't help but look at where their mother had disappeared to be a tree, and wondered if one of the trees nearby happened to be her. He sighed, and dropped his other bags to the ground, keeping the duffel bag close. "Okay...I guess it's time."

Anders put his own bags down and stood awkwardly. "Time for what, exactly?"

Mike slowly started putting the stones around Anders in a circle, as he slowly went through the steps that his mother had explained to him in his head as he did so. He didn't want to mess this up and hurt his brother. When he was done, he carefully pulled out the blanket with the sword in it, and uncovered it. He heard Anders let out a sharp gasp.

"What the hell Mike? What are you doing? What are up with these...rocks?" Anders backed up slightly when Mike turned around.

"It's kinda weird to explain, but Anders, you have to believe what I'm saying. You're a god."

Anders stared blankly at Mike for a moment, before he burst out laughing. "A...A god? I know I'm amazing and all, but I don't think I'm a god or anything!" He laughed, and slowly became quiet when he realized that Mike didn't even crack a smile. "You're...You're being serious right now...A god?" 

"Yes. I'm one as well. When mum took me to the forest when I turned 21, she did the same thing we're going to do right now." Mike took a deep breath. "I'm sorry if this isn't the best thing, but she only left me with about two sentences of explanation before she went off to become a tree."

"Become...a...a tree?!" Anders screeched, in a rather high pitched voice. "Okay, okay, first you're telling me I'm a...a god! And now you're telling me our mum became a tree. A fucking tree. This has got to be a lie...You can't be serious." He paused. "If I'm a 'god', does that mean you're one too? And mum?"

"Yes. I'm Ullr, god of the hunt. Mum was Freyr, and dad was Njörðr. You see, when a god turns 21, his powers manifest. This ceremony is to figure out exactly which Norse god you are. There's a lot more to explain about it, but that has to be done later." Mike held up the sword to Anders. "Now take it."

He handed the sword to Anders, and moved out of the ring of stones. Anders shifted a bit, looking rather apprehensive at the sword in his hands. "What am I supposed to do with it...?" 

Mike tried to remember. "Hold it up." He felt like he was forgetting something.

There was really no time to think, because Anders' scream pierced his ears and his eyes were temporarily blinded from the lightning bolt that suddenly struck near him directly onto Anders. He fell backwards, and then realized what he had forgot after he heard another scream of panic. His clothes. He got up quickly and stumbled over to a panicking Anders who had thrown off his jacket and t-shirt, which were now burning on the ground. 

Anders spun around. "Mike! That was my favorite jacket! Why didn't you tell me a fucking lightning bolt would come out of nowhere and hit me!" He was all jittery. "Holy fuck!" He looked up at Mike, his eyes widening. "Wait...So which god am I? Please tell me I didn't lose my jacket for nothing." 

Mike paused for a moment, silently wondering how his mother had figured out which god he was. But then it hit him, what his mother had said. He hoped he was right, because Olaf was supposed to have been here to tell Anders. But no, he had disappeared 'following the waves'. "...Bragi. God of poetry."

"Oh..." Anders furrowed his eyebrows. "What does he do?"

"How should I know? Olaf should have been here to explain it all to you...Really, this wasn't the best god ceremony ever. I just hope Ty's improves from this one, because honestly I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing."

"Yeah, you really don't look like you know what you're doing. I'm glad I ended up being your guinea pig though." Anders said sarcastically, but he continued. "Olaf? Is cousin Olaf a god too?" He perked up slightly.

"Yes, and he's our oracle. Damn unreliable, but we're stuck with him. He's Baldr, god of rebirth. He ages really slowly. Oh by the way, he's our grandfather, not our cousin." Mike tucked the sword away and began picking up the stones.

"Oh...Wait. What?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I noticed that Mike and Axl were both naked for their god ceremonies, and Ty was more likely than not too. Anders was the only one who mentioned that his jacket was ruined.


	4. Axl's First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A request from Annethecaptain on tumblr! I'm going to be writing about first dates, starting with Axl and then working my way up!

Axl was 13 years old when he had his first date. His first real date, because his brothers wouldn't be coming along and embarrassing him greatly. Because if there was something that the Johnson brothers were good at besides arguing, it was embarrassing each other in any way possible. They pull pranks or say strange things, and everyone who lived near them knew to watch out for those Johnson boys, because you had no clue what they were up to. It was mainly because most of the time they had no adult supervision. There was Mike, and that's it. And Mike could only be a subpar guardian at best, and he often partook in most of the stuff they did.

So that's why when he had to go back to his house to quickly pick up a jacket before he went out on his date, he was nervous. His brothers knew full well that this was Axl's first proper date, and they were strangely calm when Axl announced his plans about his date. His brothers being calm was never a good sign. 

"Just as a warning, my brothers are...A bit weird." Axl said to his date, and she smiled at him.

"Oh, it's fine! I'm sure they're not too bad!" Her voice was a bit high pitched, and she was actually a bit annoying from what he knew. But she had asked him out on a date, and what was he to do? He didn't want to seem lame to anyone, so he accepted.

He just nodded at her as they walked up the steps to the door, and when he unlocked it with his key, he braced himself with what was to come. But nothing happened. He opened the front door a bit wider, but no one seemed to be inside the house. He glanced back at the girl he was with, and she was still obliviously smiling at him without a care in the world. He gave a small smile back, and turned to actually go get his jacket. That's when he swore he heard footsteps, and he quickly turned around again and nearly yelped out in fear.

"What are your intentions with my brother??" Mike asked, in a painfully bad American southern accent. And he was holding...

"Mike where the fuck did you get a shotgun?" Axl screeched as he pulled his now pale date back behind him away from his brother, who was casually holding a shotgun in his hands.

"I have my sources. Right Anders?" 

Oh god, Anders. It seems that he raided their mother's closet and was wearing a random assortment of female clothing and holding a frying pan much like a baseball bat. The grin that he had on his face was positively terrifying, and Axl actually feared for his own life. 

"We just want to make sure this strange high pitched pre-teen is good enough for our little brother! We don't want his heart broken, right Ty?" Anders said in a rather sing-songy voice.

"Ty?" Axl whirled around to see Ty casually holding some weird sharp instruments that looked like they were for ice carving. But they were sharp, and the maniacal look on Ty's face didn't help. "Holy shit!"

The girl screamed as all three weapons were pointed at her, and she quickly ran away, leaving the four brothers standing on the porch. Axl's face was growing red with anger as he glared at his brothers who were all grinning with satisfaction. "What the hell guys? I told you not to fuck it up and you went and did it anyways!" He whined.

"We meant what we said. She wasn't worth it anyways little brother. Her voice was really annoying too, and just last week you were complaining about the bitch, so why date her?" Anders said casually.

Axl looked confused. "Because...That's what you're supposed to do right? I mean you're with a new girl every few days!"

Mike cut in before Anders could reply. "Anders is a whore, you know that. You have to find yourself a proper girl, one you like. Not just some random girl who asked you just because she probably wanted to seem cooler in the eyes of her peers."

Ty nodded. "And anyways, Anders and Mike did the same thing on my first date. Call it a tradition if you will, although Anders actually raiding mum's closet was a nice touch to the over protective parents bit. Even if he really doesn't care much."

Anders rolled his eyes and moved forward to ruffle Axl's hair. "Come on, let's go inside. These clothes are itchy as fuck.


	5. Ty's First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing on from Axl's first date, we have Ty's first date!

Ty had to admit it, he was lucky. Not only had he managed to snag a date with a nice girl from the book club that he had reluctantly joined. It had been Anders idea for him to join the club, oddly enough. He said that it would be mainly girls in the club, so even Ty would probably be able to get a date with a nice quiet bookish girl that would compliment his quiet broody personality. But she had quickly proved to be made of tougher stuff when Anders and Mike suddenly appeared with guns and frying pans at the ready to scare her off. She hadn't been fazed at all, while Ty had let out an extremely unmanly scream that he knew Anders would never let him forget about. Axl had been oblivious to the whole thing, too busy watching TV to care why his older brothers looked like they were going to attack a girl in a sweater.

They had ended up going to a bowling alley together, and neither of them were saying much. They'd just awkwardly look away when they made eye contact. Neither of them were very good at bowling either. They were barely a few points up and constantly getting gutterballs that would clearly bring dishonor upon their families. 

"Do...Do you want me to get you a drink?" Ty said suddenly, looking at his date.

"O-Oh...Alright." She replied, mumbling slightly as her face grew a bit red.

Ty nodded and quickly went to get them drinks, and when he returned, she gratefully accepted the drink and immediately took a sip. Ty smiled a bit. The date actually wasn't going that bad, even if they only really spoke in short sentences to each other, and mainly just quiet compliments for when they actually manage to knock down some pins as opposed to missing completely. The only thing Ty noticed is whenever he brushed up against her, she seemed to shrink away slightly, and she tended to give him strange, almost curious looks. 

 

After a rather abysmal game of bowling, they had finally relented and were on their way home when his date finally spoke up and actually said something more than the usual short sentences. "You know Ty, you can tell me anything you'd like. Honestly, I won't judge..." She said looking at him, trailing off slightly near the end.

"What?" He had no idea where that had come from.

"I'm being serious! I mean...I understand it can be difficult to talk about, but I'm really very understanding..." She continued.

"I still have no idea what you're talking about..."

"I...Well you're in the book club, and I always see you hanging out with girls and not guys..." She paused for a bit. "And really would like to be friends with you, but I don't want to be a cover up for your sexuality Ty!"

Ty froze, and stared at her blankly for a moment before his face grew red. "Oh no, I'm...I'm not..."

She seemed to realize, and blushed. "Oh...Oh god I'm so sorry Ty....I just thought since....Well...You were in the book club and you were always so kind to the rest of us girls...I-I mean I guess I just assumed." She was waving her hands about in an erratically nervous fashion, and Ty didn't know what to say. "Really Ty, I'm so sorry about this...But we can still be friends right?" She looked a bit desperate, hoping she hadn't just ruined their friendship.

"Yeah...It's fine. Honestly, it's fine." He said with a bit of a sigh. And he thought it had gone so well, and it ended up on an awkward note.

He just hoped it wouldn't happen again.


	6. Mother's Day Interlude!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their mother went and became a tree, Mike and Anders became some sort of fucked up version of Dad and Mum, and of course Ty and Axl planned their mother's day accordingly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hold firm belief that when the Johnson Bros. aren't acting like asshats to each other, they're actually quite mischievous towards each other.

Anders swore he had heard the door open in the early hours of the morning, but due to his being half asleep, that wasn't exactly the most reliable source. It could have easily been a one night stand deciding to leave, because that tended to be the case most of the time. The only thing being he didn't actually remember bringing anyone home with him, so that was an issue. But at the time he didn't care, so he had just dropped off to sleep again without another passing thought as to who might be entering or exiting his flat at the moment.

The second time was later in the morning, and it was the sound of something crashing onto the floor and a loud banging noise echoing throughout the flat. That caused Anders to shoot up in his bed and stare wildly around for a moment. He heard hurried and rather angry whispers coming from outside of his room, and now he was sure that someone was in his house. He had just wanted to sleep in for once, but instead he had to deal with whoever the fuck decided to enter uninvited. He hastily put on some sweatpants and wandered out of his bedroom. He was greeted to seeing his kitchen in complete disarray, and the source of the loud bang was a pot that was now lying overturned on the ground. Dirty dishes were piled in the sink and there were various foods still left out along with dirty dishes that never made it to the sink.

"Umm...What the fuck?" He turned around to see the source of the mess, to see Axl and Ty standing behind him, with Axl holding a tray full of food. "Okay, as much as I love breakfast, I am going to have to ask why you decided to come into my house and fuck up my kitchen to create said food." Anders asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't you remember what day it is today Anders?" Ty asked.

Anders stared blankly at both of them. "It's Sunday."

Axl nodded. "Yeah! But it's mother's day you know!" He seemed quite proud of himself.

"That's all fine and dandy, but I'm not sure if you two have noticed, I'm not mum. She's a tree you know. But I'll still accept the breakfast if it isn't poisoned."

Ty rolled his eyes. "We're perfectly aware that mum is a tree, Anders. But Axl pointed out that you and Mike kinda became mum and dad after our actual mum and dad left. We figured you'd get the honor of being mum because Mike would just kill us if we implied he were mum. You don't have the body strength to do that, so we figured it'd be safe."

Axl added on excitedly. "And anyways, even if you weren't exactly the best at taking care of us, you always made sure we had lunch and stuff for school so that is better than what mum did for us! You're helping me search for Frigg too, so we might as well do something to say thanks!" He held up the tray. "So...Happy mother's day!"

Ty easily went over and picked up Anders before he could respond and carried him back to his bedroom, and Axl set up the tray carefully. 

Anders looked up at both of them. "I'm not sure whether I should feel insulted at that stab at my upper body strength, but I'll let it slide for now. It was in good thought." He sipped his juice, before glancing up at them again. "But you are aware I'm not cleaning that mess you left in the kitchen, right? If I'm mum for today then you'd best be treating me like a queen." He leaned back with a smirk on his face as both younger brothers quickly complied with what he had to say.

Yeah, Anders could deal with being mum, if it meant he could boss around his brothers for the day.


	7. Anders' First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Anders was young, he wasn't a very popular guy. At all. With anyone. So he took the chance he could to get a date, even if it wasn't exactly his usual preference.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was having so much trouble trying to figure out Anders' first date that I literally just said 'fuck it' and wrote this. 
> 
> Warning: uh...slash.

Anders lived most of his childhood being hated by pretty much everyone in existence because he was annoying, manipulative, and short. Well, they didn't really hate him because he was short, but they often chose that part of him to tease him about. The only companions he ever had were the endless supply of goldfish that Mike gave him (the current one being Kevin the beta fish), and all of that was fine and dandy until he turned thirteen years old.

Edwin was a new guy, and clearly puberty was treating him much better than it was treating Anders at the moment. He was taller, lean, with brown hair and brown eyes. Every single girl seemed to swoon at him whenever he passed by, but one thing Anders noticed was that Edwin tended to stare at him a lot. Like, getting to the point where it was slightly creepy and he was considering going to a teacher to make him stop. But Anders never did that, instead he walked straight up to the guy to confront him personally. Which was probably a bad idea because he was about a head taller than Anders.

"Yeah, so I've noticed you've been staring at me ever since you got here. Can you stop please?" His voice cracked mid-sentence, and some girls nearby started laughing at him.

"Oh, you've noticed?" The bastard didn't even attempt to deny the accusation, which Anders wasn't expecting.

"U-uh...Yeah. I mean..." Anders searched for words. "It was a bit obvious."

The taller boy leaned in uncomfortably close. "Well you're an interesting guy to look at, Anders Johnson."

Anders took a step back. "Uh. Great. So we have that settled, I'm going to go now--" Before Anders could scurry away, Edwin grabbed his arm. "Uh, yeah, if you could let go that'd be great..."

"Would you like to see a movie with me?"

"What."

"You know, going to a theater, paying tickets, watching a movie. That type of thing. With me." How the fuck can that guy keep his composure while Anders was flailing about like a fish out of water.

"A date?" Anders wasn't really questioning the fact about how it was a guy that was asking but more about the fact that someone was actually asking him out on a date.

Edwin smiled at him. "Yes."

"Well...Okay." Wait, why was he agreeing with this? Anders wasn't into guys. But it was too late to back out now.

Edwin smiled even wider and dared to lean forward and give Anders a peck on the lips, which caused the shorter boy to grow bright red. There were gasps all around them from girls who had been watching them like hawks. It looks like their fantasy was broken now that they knew that Edwin was never interested in them to begin with, and Anders quickly realized that all his classmates probably thought he was gay. And going out with Edwin. A guy. And that guy looked so goddamn happy that Anders didn't say anything else about the matter and just awkwardly smiled back, hoping he wouldn't fuck anything up.

The date had gone surprisingly well, the movie was great, and they actually went out to eat afterwards. But more importantly Anders kept a secret from his family, because he didn't want them to know that he had just gone out on an awesome date with a guy. Mike and Ty would never let him hear the end of it, and Axl would just giggle and hold his arms up so Anders could carry him. He was extremely glad that his parents or his brothers really didn't care enough to ever wonder where Anders disappeared to. So his secret was safe. But he had to admit that he really did enjoy the date, and he thought that Edwin was a pretty nice guy besides the fact that he stared at Anders a lot sometimes. And that date wasn't a first time thing, they went out a few more times before Edwin ended up moving to America. But his brothers never found out. As far as they're concerned Anders' first date was with some chick when he was fifteen.

It was nice keeping his own little secrets.


	8. Mike's First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before Valerie dated Robb, they did have a date. Once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was quite possibly the most difficult one to write, because I don't really have the best grasp on Mike's character as I do with the other brothers, so that's why instead of inventing a character for his first date like all the others, I ended up going with Val.

Mike, Val, and Robb were at that age where it was extremely important that you were dating someone. It didn't matter who, nor how long the dating actually lasted, but you had to be dating. Really they were all just kids who had no idea what dating someone really meant, and they still had to get permission from their parents to actually go out and hang out for awhile (not that Mike's mum or dad actually cared much what he did.) But Mike still hadn't dated anyone yet. Robb was with some overly peppy girl who had a weird obsession with horses, and Val wasn't with anyone either. Mike had thought of asking her out on a date before, but decided against it because he as much as he loved her, it was only as a friend. Yet Robb had oh so kindly pointed out that Mike wasn't getting any younger (They were fourteen, which was practically ancient in most people's books to not have dated anyone before.)

So while they were studying in the library, Mike looked up abruptly and asked. "Do you want to go to the movies, Val?" 

She gave him a sly grin. "Are you asking me out Mikkel Johnson?" 

Mike blinked. "...Yes?" Smooth.

She laughed at his rather stupid response and nodded. "Of course! Maybe we could make it a double date with Robb and what's her face!" She looked at their third friend.

"Gwen, and yeah I'm up for it."

When they arrived at the theater, Mike concluded that it didn't actually feel much like a date. Really the only thing remotely different than their usual outings as friends was that he and Val were shyly holding hands and that Robb wouldn't stop making out with Gwen. Well, scratch that last part, Robb always did that. But other than that, there was really absolutely no change.

"Fuck..." He groaned as he failed for the third time to win Val a plushie from the little crane machine in the arcade that they had all ended up in.

"Aww, it's okay Mike. I know you're really horrible at these things, you didn't have to waste your money trying to win me the little stuffed doggy." She pat his shoulder.

"You know I'm absolute shit at any kind of game we play, and yet I still insist I try. No wonder I'm always broke." He smiled in amusement. "Maybe someday I'll somehow magically gain the power to win any game I want."

"Yeah, but for now you're still complete shit at everything, bro." Robb helpfully pointed out.

Mike almost wanted to pout at that comment, but instead tried again at getting that little stuffed dog that Val wanted. He put all his concentration on attempting to get it, and even imagining that he had those powers he was talking about earlier. Being able to win any game he played...Damn, that would be cool. He'd probably abuse the shit out of that. 

"Mike you did it!" Val squealed as the stuffed puppy fell down the shoot. 

Mike was part shocked and part pleased with himself that he actually managed to do it. And Val looked so happy holding that plush animal that she moved forward and planted a kiss on Mike's cheek. And for a moment he wondered what would happen if they actually continued dating. But, nothing ever really happened between the two of them, and a few weeks later after Robb's nasty break up with Gwen, he got together with Val. And Mike was okay with that.


	9. Karaoke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Family Night with the Johnsons, and Olaf brought a karaoke machine.

Olaf had suddenly decided that the only way that the Johnsons would achieve any sort of family unity was that they had to spend more time together as a family. This meant meeting more often than just having to instigate Things for whatever reason, (the most recent being Anders' drinking problem, which had ended up not being solved at all) and it also meant not being allowed to fight. So every single Friday was now deemed as Family Night as decreed by Odin (Olaf said it'd be more official that way.)

The first few weeks that they had the family night weren't very successful, and ended up with Ty and Ander nearly punching each other by the end of it most of the time. But as time went on they became more used to the idea of being forced to spend time with each other one day a week. For once they did rather normal things, like playing board games or cards (which Mike always won) or crowding around one of Axl's gaming systems in attempts to play video games. Sometimes they even went out to the mini golf course to play golf, and although Mike tended to win every game they ever played, they just decided that he didn't count.

This Friday they were somewhat at a loss for what they wanted to do. They were sick of board games and video games. They couldn't go out and play golf because the weather wasn't very agreeable with the strong wind and drizzle of rain. So they were stuck inside and in general very grumpy. Olaf wasn't even there with them, because he said that he was going to get something very quickly before arriving at Ty's place (where they were having that weeks family night). Of course for Olaf, 'very quickly' meant that he'd already been gone for about 4 hours.

"I say we just give up and start drinking!" Anders said with drunken enthusiasm as he poured himself another drink. 

"You've been drinking Anders. And Olaf will get here soon. Hopefully." Mike glanced out the window to see if there was any sign of their grandpa.

After another hour of waiting and growing continually grumpier by the minute, Olaf stumbled in with a large box and a large grin. 

"What do you have in the box?" Axl asked with genuine curiosity, as Olaf set it carefully on the ground. "Is it drugs?" 

Olaf shook his head. "For once grandson, it is not. Because it's all gloomy outside and you guys were obviously not very happy, I brought a karaoke machine. No games, no thinking, and no Mike winning. Just a good old family bonding over how horrible our voices are."

"Speak for yourself grandpa," Anders slurred, sloshing a bit of his drink on Mike, who Anders was currently attempting to crawl over to get to Olaf. "I happen to sing like an aaangel."

"Angel of death..." Ty said rolling his eyes as Mike shoved Anders off of him. "I'm fairly sure you've made children cry just by speaking."

"Excuse you, angry popsicle man. But I'm not the god of cold and dark, I'm the god of poetry. That means I'm automatically good at the...words..thing."

"Yeah, beautiful. Clearly."

Anders managed to crawl his way over to where Olaf was setting up the karaoke machine and grabbed one of the microphones, but instead of using it himself, he stumbled over to where Axl was and shoved the microphone into his hands.

"Youngest sings first. It's the rules as decreed by Bragi god of awesome." He slumped onto the couch.

Axl looked up at his brothers with pleading eyes. "I don't really have to sing first do I?"

"You heard the god of awesome." Mike shrugged at him. "Youngest sings first. For once I'm glad for being the oldest. Besides Olaf."

Axl wasn't as bad as they were bracing themselves for, although he wasn't very good at hitting very high or very low notes. It didn't help that he stumbled over every other word because he kept looking around at them hoping that they weren't judging him to harshly. Ty's song went much better, although he was more speaking the lyrics than he actually was singing. It didn't help that Anders had started cat-calling and yelling Freebird every few seconds. 

Anders caused all of them to go into a fit of giggles. He was still incredibly drunk, and had decided that he was going to serenade them with incredibly offkey renditions of Lady Gaga songs. He just kept going too. Every time a song ended he'd immediately start up another one. Mike was grateful of Anders being drunk for once, because it meant that he didn't have to sing. Olaf had even joined Anders in singing 'Don't Go Breaking My Heart', and afterwards they both ended up passing out on the ground.

The three brothers that were still pretty much sober had ended up dragging them into one of the guest bedrooms to sleep it out, but overall it had been a huge success. They probably wouldn't be doing it again any time soon just to avoid having two members of there family become incredibly drunk and singing cheesy love songs, but at least they managed to get most of it on video.

"And Mike you're going to have to sing first next time, you do realize." Ty said to Mike as they shoved Anders onto the bed. 

"Yeah, well we won't be doing this for a long time..."

"Don't think we'll forget though, because unlike Anders and Olaf, Axl and I were fairly sober the whole time."

"Yeah, yeah. I guess I will. It'll be your funeral though."


	10. Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Johnson Brothers relive a memory from the past.

It had started with another family night. It was a normal one this time, and no one got completely drunk. Unfortunately the weather was proving that it'd be difficult for them to all make it to their respective homes safely, so they were all stuck in Ty's home for the night. Mike had claimed the guest bedroom while everyone else had to fend for themselves with the couches and piles of blankets that Ty had thrown at them. Mike was quiet as he listened to the rumbles of thunder and occasionally saw a flash of lightning. Personally, he was never scared of thunderstorms. He actually found comfort in hearing them and often fell asleep rather quickly when it was storming outside. But he remembered way back when he and his brothers were much younger. His brothers unlike him, had been quite scared of thunderstorms.

Funnily enough, it'd always start with Anders. But then again the shortest Johnson was always weary of things that he couldn't talk his way out of, and storms weren't exactly things you could talk away. Since Anders was able, he would make his way into Mike's room and curl up in his bed without a single word uttered the whole time. But Mike could always feel the flinches and shivers coming from the smaller body curled up next to him whenever thunder crashed. After Ty was born, it became the same thing with him. First Anders would arrive and curl up in Mike's bed, and then Ty would come in and lay down on Mike's other side. It had been strange at first, having a brother clinging onto him from both sides.

Mike had been bracing himself after Axl was born, and sure enough as soon as the boy was able to, he'd come in after Anders and Ty and wriggle in between himself and Anders and fall asleep peacefully, drooling on Mike. It was amusing to Mike, especially because by then Anders and Ty were probably considered too old to be running to their brothers room to hide from the storms, but he thinks that they just got so used to it that they just continued without questioning it.

It was like that until god shit went all up in their business and their family essentially became more torn apart than it had been before. That little comfort that they gave each other suddenly disappeared along with everyone in their family. But the fact that they were all putting in an effort to become friendly with each other again was good, even if they were having a rather rocky beginning. But Mike could easily tell that they were getting better. He heard from Ty that he and Anders were meeting up more often, and the same with Axl. 

Mike had been so absorbed in his own thoughts that he didn't feel the bed dip slightly until he heard another crash of thunder and a hand clutch his shirt.

"Uh...What are you...?"

"Just don't question it Mike." He heard Anders whisper back as his younger brother curled up stubbornly against Mike. "The storm is pretty loud isn't it?" Another crash. Another flinch.

"You never got over that fear?"

"You can't talk away a storm. I don't like it. Now shut up so I can sleep." 

Mike knew he wasn't going to get anywhere from fighting it, so he didn't say anything. He was just falling asleep when he felt another dip in the bed from his other side. He already knew who it was without even having to ask. "You too Ty? And here I thought you guys all grew up."

He got a mumble in reply, and Ty scooted closer, stealing most of the blanket. Mike already knew what was going to happen next, and he wasn't even sure the bed would be able to support all the brothers. And sure enough, he felt someone attempting to make his way between a napping Anders and himself. Mike had to shove Anders out of the way before he was completely crushed by Axl who had finally joined the party sleeping in Mike's bed. Axl grinned bleary eyed at Mike when he noticed that Mike was staring.

"It's been awhile hasn't it?" Axl said quietly.

"Yeah. I almost kinda missed it. Although it was easier back then because you were all smaller."

Axl let out a soft laugh, before drifting off to sleep. Mike was quite warm now, with all his brothers curled up around him like they used to when they were little. The storm was still raging outside, but there was comfort in the room simply from each others presence. With Anders twitching slightly every time there was a crash of thunder, Ty hogging all the sheets, and Axl drooling on Mike. It would have generally been considered an uncomfortable experience, but it was his brothers. Simply saying that made it all right.


	11. Helping Can Be Weird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders tells the story of some of the cellphone numbers he has.

As anyone would know, for some reason giving your phone to someone to show them a single thing is apparently open invitation for them to look at everything you have contained in your phone. At least that's what Axl deemed to be true after he took Anders' phone away from him and started enthusiastically looking through everything. Anders had quite a few contacts, but they were organized in different groups that would separate clients from family. (Axl noticed that the friends group was essentially empty. There was only 3 contacts. Mitchell, Henry, and Ned. Axl would have to ask about that later.) But the one section that interested him the most were a group of cellphone numbers marked with a few random symbols. 

Axl looked at Anders who was lying down on his couch. "Anders, what are these phone numbers in this weird group." Axl held up the phone to show Anders what he meant.

Anders stared at his phone for a moment. "Oh, that's from the gang."

Axl stared at his older brother. "Gang. Like...Gang gang? Why the fuck do you have phone numbers from a gang in your cellphone?" His eyes widened. "Are you doing illegal shit? Like really illegal shit?"

Anders rolled his eyes. "Of course not, you idiot. I helped them out with something once and I got on their good side! They've actually helped me out of a few situations, so I'm not gonna lose that."

 

It had been a relatively normal day for Anders. He had actually managed to get quite a bit of work done for once, and gained quite a few new clients for his business. All in all, everything was great, and so he rewarded himself with a walk (He'd probably get drunk later for an even better reward.) As he was walking down the street, he noticed that a kid quite a bit younger than himself was struggling with quite a few bags that he was carrying. Seems like he was trying to get home from the market and thought he could carry everything to the car himself. Anders half wanted to walk away and leave the kid to figure the shit out on his own, but contrary to popular belief, he wasn't that much of an asshole. Sighing, he walked over to where the kid was struggling and tapped his shoulder.

"Need some help kid?" He asked.

The kid nodded and handed Anders with some of the bags with a sigh of relief. The car wasn't that far away from where they were, so they easily loaded up all the groceries. The kid grinned at him and said thank you. That's when shit got a bit weird. 

It seemed like out of nowhere 5 rather intimidating looking guys came out and surrounded Anders and the younger boy. Anders immediately tensed up at stared at them. They didn't do anything for a moment, before the boy happily announced that Anders had actually helped him bring all the food to the car. As soon as the boy said that, all the men broke into a grin. Anders grinned sheepishly at all of them.

"Hey, thanks for helpin' the little man with his stuff! Ain't a lotta good people like you in the world." One of the taller ones said, slapping Anders on the back, causing him to stumble forward a bit. 

"Ha...Yeah. No problem..." Anders replied awkwardly.

"If ya ever need anything little bro, you can let us know. We got your back." And with that he suddenly had a few slips of paper shoved into his hands, and the men were all gone.

He stared blankly at where the car previously was, and then looked down at the numbers in his hand. He then shoved them hastily into his pockets and quickly dialed Dawn's number as he jogged back to his house. She answered with a rather annoyed tone.

"What is it Anders? Don't tell me you did something stupid again."

"Well not exactly, but I think I just accidentally joined a gang." He ignored the gasp. "They seem nice enough though, and at least we have body guards if we ever need it, right?" He laughed and hung up before Dawn could reply. He then pulled out the slips of paper with the phone numbers and entered them on his phone. It was true, you never know when you might need some extra help.

"So that's it? You just helped some kids with groceries and these guys let you be in a gang? I didn't think it'd be that easy." Axl said thoughtfully.

"I'm not actually in the gang you dumbass. I'm just on their good side. I can get things I need whenever I need it. It's pretty kickass if I do say so myself." Anders grinned smugly as he took the phone from Axl's grasp. "Now really, why the fuck did you think it was okay to go through my phone anyways?"

"You didn't say anything before!"

"Yeah, cuz I thought you'd fucking stop!" Anders punched Axl on the arm in a rather playful manner, showing that he wasn't actually as pissed as he sounded.

"Well, I'll make my own gang!"

"What, with you and that weird kid you hang out with? I'm sure you'll be terrifying."

"Fuck off, Anders."


	12. Carts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Axl is a child. A very, very, tall child.

Mike wasn't sure why Axl had suddenly decided to invite himself to go along with Mike to the supermarket, but there he was, happily walking along side Mike as they went down the first aisle of the store. Mike couldn't help but notice a certain glint in his eye though, so he was weary when he turned away from the cart to inspect some bottles of spices on the shelf. He wasn't much of a cook, but he did know at least a bit about spices to make his own food somewhat edible.

He let out an exasperated sigh as he turned around and quickly figured out why Axl was so insistent on coming along. It was actually quite the comical sight when it came down to it. Axl was sitting comfortably in the cart with his legs hanging out and a content smile on his face. Mike knew that there was no point in trying to get his youngest brother out of the cart, because Axl would fight to the end just so he could sit in it. So he just sighed again and threw the spice bottle he had grabbed onto Axl's chest.

Axl picked it up and stared at it. “What's this even for?”

“Cooking. Which is probably something you don't do often.” Mike rolled his eyes. “Tuck your legs in at least, or else you'll be knocking things over.”

Axl complied as Mike shoved the cart forward. He was very thankful that he was even able to push the cart forward with the hulking weight of his youngest brother in it, but Axl seemed very pleased with the cart movie and had a huge dopey grin on his face the entire time as Mike pushed the cart forward. He was completely oblivious to any look they were getting from other shoppers, and instead focused his time on trying to sneak things into the cart without Mike looking.

Of course, Mike noticed every single time, so every item that Axl put into the cart was promptly put back onto the shelf until Axl found something else of interest. So then the process started all over again. It wasn't until Axl gave him a particularly pouty face as he clutched a box of extremely sugary cereal to his chest. He looked at Mike with the best puppy dog eyes he could muster, and grinned widely as Mike just sighed.

“I'm buying food for myself, why the hell am I even getting this for you?”

“Because you love me Mike!” Axl said happily as he clutched the box even tighter to his chest. “Anyways, you act like you've seen this all before so I don't know why you're complaining!”

“I have seen this all before. Your brothers have both pulled the same stunt with me multiple times. At least with Ty it was helpful because he kept the food cold, but you and Anders have no excuse.”

Axl stuck his tongue out at Mike as they approached the checkout area. The cashier stared at Axl as he helped Mike take things out of the cart, all while still sitting in it. He then carefully placed the slightly crushed box of cereal with the rest of the food, and started nudging the cart into Mike's side, trying to urge the older man to scoot him forward some more. 

“You are a fucking child, Axl.” Mike said as he quickly paid and gathered up the groceries. 

Axl was now munching on the cereal that Mike had so graciously bought for him with a cheerful expression.

“Yeah, but you still love me.”  
“And occasionally I regret that.”

Axl threw a handful of cereal at Mike's head.


	13. Eating Habits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Johnsons once again prove to be weirdos.

Two out of the four brothers could cook. Ty obviously, was the one who cooked the most frequently and found solace in baking his cupcakes and making nice meals. Anders could also cook very well, the only problem being is that he rarely was ever in the mood to cook himself, but when he did, it was a nearly magical experience. Team up both Anders and Ty, and you would more likely than not going into a delicious food-induced coma. Mike knew a few little things, enough to get by on his own. Of course that was barely anything. Axl knew even less, and in true university student nature, he managed to make entire meals using nothing but half a bag of chips, ramen, and a microwave. 

Mike knew for a fact that they could at least make themselves proper meals, but that didn't stop the younger three brothers for occasionally having rather...interesting choices in what they eat. Ty rarely had a problem with that, because he could usually make himself something somewhat healthy meals to enjoy quickly. The highest offenders were Anders and Axl, combining foods you wouldn't even think went well together and their habits of forgetting to eat all day and consuming over 2,000 calories in a half an hour.

That's why he could only groan softly when he walked into Anders kitchen to witness the shorter man pouring liberal amounts of chocolate syrup into his bag of chips as he stood at the counter in an old t-shirt in shorts. Anders looked up slowly at Mike without putting down the bottle and grinned. The exasperated look Mike gave him made his smile falter somewhat and made him put on a whiny voice.

“What? What did I do?” He set down the bottle of chocolate syrup and then pulled out a chocolate coated chip, popping it into his mouth.

Mike pointed to Anders' bag of chips. “Really? Seriously? Anders you can cook, you realize that? Do you have to really be eating...Whatever that is?” Mike gestured to the bag again.

Anders shrugged. “It tastes good.” He licked syrup off his fingers. “It's not as good as putting a lot of the syrup on cereal and adding marshmallows and a lot of sugar too it, but I was out of marshmallows today. So chocolate covered chips it is!” He shrugged like it was completely normal. “And anyways, I'm not as bad as Axl! He's like a pregnant woman when it comes to eating weird shit!”

Mike couldn't fault Anders for that, it was true that just the other day Mike had found Axl eating a banana with ketchup. Axl's excuse was that there was nothing else to eat in the house (which was actually quite believable) and that the bananas and ketchup were the only things that were left. (Although why he couldn't have just eaten the banana and left the ketchup alone was beyond Mike's thoughts.)

“I swear you're going to get diabetes one day if you keep eating like that.” Mike rolled his eyes at Anders, who had stuck his tongue out immaturely at him. 

“If I do then it'll totally be worth it.” Anders grabbed a fist full of chips and ate them up close to Mike's face, who looked thoroughly disgusted with him. “Come on, just try one! It's not that disgusting as you make it out to be!”

Mike knowing he wouldn't hear the end of it, carefully grabbed out a soggy chip, grimacing at the mess that was now on his hand. He inspected it for a moment, looking up at Anders who looked extremely excited that Mike was going to try it. Mike took a deep breath, and ate the chip, chewing carefully on it. It was then that his eyes widened considerably, and he tilted his head slightly.

“Okay...Maybe it's not that bad.” He said, grabbing the bag from Anders and grabbing a few more chips. 

“Hey! I didn't say take them all!” Anders tried to grabbed the bag back, knowing resistance was futile now that the bag was in the hands of Ullr. 

“Too late.” Mike snickered, eating another chip.

Even if only two out of the four brothers could actually cook properly, they really were four for four with brothers who have considerably strange eating habits when presented with the chance to indulge in them. While Ty may be the one who does it the least, he was about to be bombarded with the 3 other brothers, insisting that he try more weird concoctions that they make up.


	14. Makeup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's still Halloween for another two hours right as I'm posting this. IT TOTALLY COUNTS.

“Axl I swear to god if you do not stop fidgeting I will just draw dicks all over your face, and this makeup is hard to get off if you have no idea what you're doing.” Anders snapped at Axl who was once again attempting to twitch away at the black face paint that Anders was applying to his face.

Axl let out a whine. He was tired of sitting there for so long, and he deeply regretted asking Anders to help him with his face makeup for the Halloween party that Michele's mother suddenly decided to throw. From what they managed to get from Mike, Karen had been spending quite a bit of time online and saw all the cool ideas many people were doing for Halloween in other countries. Despite the fact that it's not celebrated as much in New Zealand, she immediately insisted on having a huge Halloween party. That meant costumes.

His eye twitched again as Anders neared his eye with the brush, earning a whack on the head from Anders to keep still. That was the problem with Anders, because of his creative blood, he had to do everything perfectly. That meant Axl had to sit still for uncomfortable periods of time because Anders kept finding things that he needed to fix on his face. But none too quickly, Anders finally stood back and scrutinized Axl's face for the last time before nodding to himself in satisfaction. 

“Okay, you can put your wig on now Axl.” Anders grinned, adjusting the cats ears that were sitting on his head. Anders had decided to be the Cheshire Cat, which resulted in some rather terrifying looking makeup work to make Anders' mouth seem to stretch more widely than it already could.

Axl quickly put on the white wig as best he could and examined his own reflection. He had to admit, Anders did a really great job on his Jack Skellington makeup. Anders had been the one with the costume idea, saying that Axl's body type would fit Jack Skellington perfectly. Looking at himself now, he knew Anders had been right. 

After quickly putting on the rest of the costume, both brothers made their way to the party, which was already underway. They found Ty and Mike milling in the kitchen with beers in hand, and Ty was all done up in spandex dressed as Superman, and Mike looked exactly like he always did.

“What? No costume?” Anders asked, grabbing a beer.

Mike tapped a sticker on his chest, which proclaimed 'Hello, My Name is Steven'. “See? Costume.”

Anders rolled his eyes. “That is not a costume. That is a sticker with a name that isn't yours. You're uncreative as shit, Mike.”

Mike rolled his eyes. “We can't all be Picassos like you Anders.” He leaned forward and smudged part of Anders' makeup with his thumb before striding out to talk with Michele.

Anders immediately let out a girly shriek of horror, and immediately pulled a makeup case out of seemingly nowhere before running off to the bathroom in a panic. Axl and Ty were left cackling with laughter nearly dropping their beers on the ground. Ty finally stopped laughing and stretched.

“Damn, this spandex is uncomfortable...” He groaned. 

Axl nodded. “I'm too scared to touch my face right now. I feel like if I do, Anders will end up sitting me down for another 3 hours to completely redo my makeup.” He shuddered.

Karen chose that moment to bustle over to them, grinning widely in her silver Elvish robes and long blonde hair. “Oooh, Superman, very dashing Ty.” She looked over Axl. “Oooh Jack Skellington...” Ty and Axl could see Karen's mind immediately setting to work. She brightened up. “Christmas...AND Halloween! Oh...I think I must start planning a costume Christmas Party! Oooh it'll be lovely!” She said excitedly.

She ran off, nearly tripping from a combination of her long robes and her general tipsy-ness from the drinks. Ty and Axl could only look at each other in horror at the thought of having to go to another costume party.


	15. Veggies and Fish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Axl is in disbelief. And he's also an idiot. But that isn't anything new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so yayhodr and I have been messing around with headcanons and we came up with the idea of Ty being pescetarian and Anders being vegetarian. (Obviously this goes away from actual canon because we've seen Anders eat chicken wings, but this is meant to be silly)

Axl loved his brothers dearly, but there were simply a few things about their lifestyles that he could barely wrap his mind around. Mike, not so much. He was easy enough to understand to Axl, besides the fact that he was very dad-like. There were the few horrifying times that Mike would decide to break out the 'dad jokes' much to the terror of anyone in the vicinity at the time. But Ty and Anders made some rather interesting choices in their own lifestyles that Axl couldn't ever imagine doing. Anders had started much earlier in his life. Back when he was still living with Mike, Val, and the rest. He had just randomly decided one day that he didn't want to eat meat. No one thought he was serious thought, because they thought he was doing it to piss everyone off.

But he actually didn't, and it got pretty bad until Olaf came to the rescue and actually helped Anders get some sort of proper nutrition without having to eat meat. It was lucky that Olaf was very hippy-like at that time and therefore knew quite a bit about vegetarianism. Axl had to admit that he may have teased Anders quite a bit during that time about not eating meat. The usual childish garbage like how he was taller than Anders because he actually ate meat. Anders would just scowl and stick his tongue out at Axl, mainly because he didn't have much upper body strength. Then of course all the stuff with Anders turning 21 and then hightailing it out of there happened, and Axl could only assume that Anders continued his usual vegetarian diet. It was when Ty was nearing 21 that he decided he was going to become pescetarian.

Of course, Axl had no fucking clue what that even meant. But Ty was at least helpful enough to explain that it meant he didn't eat red meats or poultry, but still ate fish. Axl didn't really much like the sound of that, but with Ty being the health nut that he was, it sort of made sense. In Axl's mind it was at least better than giving up meat entirely like Anders had. But even after they all met up again and it was confirmed that Anders was indeed still a vegetarian, Axl thought it was nice that despite that, Anders still always seemed to have some sort of lunch meat or hot dogs in his fridge to satisfy Axl and Olaf whenever they decided to stop by and steal food. He also had an endless supply of junk food that Axl was happy to munch on. 

"But...I don't understand. How can you even live knowing the taste of steak, bacon, chicken wings!" Axl whined as he stabbed a piece of the vegetarian lasagna that Anders had been so gracious enough to serve him.

"With hard work and determination." Anders said dryly, rolling his eyes and taking a bite of his food. "Just think of all the cute animals that were murdered and come back and talk to me."

Ty chuckled. "Really Axl, it's not that bad. I mean I still eat fish and stuff, but I guess you get so used to it you don't even care." He shrugged.

Axl tentatively ate a bite of the lasagna, before taking another, and another. "...Okay this is actually pretty good." Anders smiled at that. "But it totally would have been better if there was beef in it."

Anders sighed dramatically. "Nothing can ever please you, Axl. And even after I keep whatever meat-like substance those lunchmeats and hotdogs are to keep you satisfied whenever you come over. Now I might even have to lock my junk food away because it's mine."

Axl's eyes widened. "No, no! It's good! Awesome even!" He took a huge bite and nearly choked on a large piece that he didn't chew. "Great!" He said, coughing.

"Christ, you don't have to kill yourself trying to please us!" Anders said, thumping his back. "Be like Mike. Be quiet, eat your veggies and or fish, and say thank you." He looked at Ty before rolling his eyes again. "You'd think after all these years of us never budging from our eating habits that he'd finally be used to it, but he still can't comprehend the idea of not eating meat."

Ty gave Anders a half-grin. "Yeah, but that's Axl for you. He may be Odin but sometimes he's too dense for his own good." He patted the youngest brother on the back. "Seriously Axl, I may not eat meat but I can make you something with it if you really want."

Axl shook his head. "Nah, it's fine. I actually do really like the lasagna that Anders made. I promise."

"Yeah, yeah. Just don't choke on it again Axl. I don't want you to die and kill us for it, Axl." Anders said, shoving another helping of food in Axl's direction. "And I have ice cream for dessert, for when you magically gain your second stomach after eating half of my food and still looking around for more."

Axl let out a holler of joy and nearly choked again from speeding through his dinner.


	16. Sacred Holy Nommies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cookies are serious business.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas to you all! :)

It was well known in the Johnson household that food, especially food during Christmas, was practically as sacred as the very gods they were. Only a select few of the Johnsons were blessed with a very good ability to cook, and in their current generation that happened to be Ty and Anders. Everyone knew that Ty was the obvious chef, with all the meals that he would invite everyone over to enjoy and the cupcakes that he made that were to die for. The lesser known chef was Anders. But of course he had to learn at a young age after their dad shot through and their mum became a tree. Mike was quite literally useless for any proper cooking unless it was grilling or takeout, and Axl was at least lucky to have Zeb guide him to making a decent meal. Anders rarely actually cooked, because he was usually just never in the mood. The only times he really cooked was if he was trying to 'woo' a particularly hard to get man or woman.

After they had a taste of his cooking, it wasn't too hard to get them into his bed afterwards. The other time he actually cooked for someone he wasn't trying to sleep with was when Axl and Ty were being particularly annoying with their pleading. Not many people knew, but one of Anders' strongest weaknesses is when his younger brothers dared to gang up on him with puppy dog eyes. It had been like this ever since he became 'mum' to them after everyone else was pretty much gone. They could get right under Anders' skin and get him to pretty much do anything with a few well placed words and facial expressions. Anders may be Bragi, but only Axl and Ty had that strong 'little brother face' that could possibly surpass Anders' own little brother face that he put on when he wanted to convince Mike to do something. It was barely even possible to form words into what it'd be like if all three brothers ganged up on Mike or Olaf. That would be pure terror raining down upon Auckland. They were nigh unstoppable when they teamed up.

One of those moments with Axl and Ty happened a few days before Christmas. Anders had been perfectly content with just staying at home and drinking Christmas away on his own (or possibly with a man and woman on each of his arms), but Ty and Axl had suddenly appeared at his doorway insisting that he come to their Christmas party that they were having with Mike and the rest of the gods and goddesses. Ty then proceeded to say that they could cook together just like old times when they were young and making meals to feed the rest of the family. Anders' face softened a bit at that memory, but he still proceeded to slam the door in their faces and quickly retreating to his bedroom and locking the door. He almost felt proud of himself, he was actually able to avoid Axl and Ty of convincing him to do something that he really didn't feel like doing.

It wasn't until a good hour later that he had the sudden urge to go to a Christmas party, and one quick check of his laptop made him groan out of anger. "You fucking bastards." He muttered.

He had opened his most recent email, and in it was a charmingly tacky invite with clipart gifs of dancing Christmas trees inviting Anders' to 'Lofn's Christmas Party Spectacular!' on Christmas day. Leave it to his brothers to figure out a way to make him attend without having to be in their presence. Now Anders had to go, as Lofn's power dictated. He sighed and set his laptop on his bedside table, and he tiredly ran his fingers through his hair and rubbed his eyes in frustration. He laid back on his bed, and began playing with the hem of his shirt. Even though he didn't really want to go, he was already planning what sorts of pots and pans he needed to bring over to Karen's house and what sorts of food he was going to make. He didn't trust Karen enough to have the right equipment he needed, and although Ty was definitely more trustworthy, Anders preferred his own cooking utensils.

"Oh god, I'm really doing this." Anders groaned, before turning over on his bed and falling asleep. Pretty much all his dreamed of was cooking, and possibly setting his brothers on fire in a way that would make Colin Gundersen proud.

The next few days flew by quickly, and soon enough Anders and Ty were holed up in the kitchen mixing, cutting, marinating, baking, and blending to their highest capacity. They were actually joined by Stacey, and Olaf seemed to always appear when they were suddenly getting in over their heads to help out before disappearing out the door again when they had everything under control. Everyone else was banned from the kitchen, although there was some grumbling over it. Luckily Stacey had prepared some appetizers to appease the ravenous beasts that were the gods and goddesses. While Anders finished putting the last batch of cookies he glanced up to see Axl waiting like a puppy by the doorway, staring at the food laden table behind Anders with such a sadness Anders would have thought the poor boy hadn't eaten properly for weeks. (Which he had eaten just fine, because he had witnessed Axl eat a pizza and a half the other day)

"Having fun there Axl?" Ty asked laughing from next to Anders, where he was wiping down the counters with a washcloth.

"It smells so good..." Axl whined. "When are we eating? Soon? Now?" He said hopefully, eyeing the food again.

"Soon enough Axl." Anders laughed, shaking his head. Seeing the look of dejection on his youngest brother's face made Anders feel a bit bad though, and so he ended up doing something that could quite possibly be considered out of character for him. He walked over and grabbed a single cookie off a tray on the table and walked over to Axl. "One. The sacred, and most holy one. This is all you get before everything is all ready, and you're the only one getting it so don't be a showoff about it or we'll have a bunch of angry, naggy gods and goddesses complaining about how they didn't get cookies." He handed the still warm cookie to Axl who accepted it with wide eyes and a wide grin.

Anders could barely contain his laughter as he watched Axl eat it as carefully as possible, taking care to make sure not a single bit was lost and that he savored each bite. Axl seemed very pleased when he trotted off back to the rest of the gods and goddesses like a happy puppy, and Ty just shook his head at the entire thing. "I swear he's still an over excited puppy even in his twenties." He raised an eyebrow at Anders. "And I didn't expect you to actually give him anything. Usually you would have just torn him a new one and sent him off defeated."

Anders shrugged. "What can I say? Maybe you guys really did infect me with the joy of Christmas."

"Yeah, right. And I'm Frosty the Snowman."

"Well..."

"Don't you dare."


	17. Bonfire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a fun ride, guys :)

Everything was hectic the few moments before they actually went on the road. They had all met up at Axl's flat, and they were all scrambling to actually load everything in all the cars that they were taking. All the former gods and goddesses (and Dawn and Zeb) were invited to this spur of the moment beach trip they were all having. There was enough laughter to be had already, and they hadn't even made it to the beach yet. Anders had already managed to drop a cooler on his foot, and watching him jump up and down swearing loudly as Ty picked up the contents was hilarious. Hell, it was enough of a shock to see Anders actually dressed casually, wearing shorts and a ratty old t-shirt he had borrowed from Ty.

After they managed to get everything ready, everyone piled into all the cars and made the trek out to the beach that the Johnsons distinctly remembered going to when they were kids. Everyone was incredibly cramped, and Anders and Ty were mumbling because as the shortest two members of the family, they were both forced to be sitting on Axl and Olaf's laps because there wasn't enough room for them to sit with all the stuff they were carrying, because they were all staying overnight on the camping grounds. Olaf was actually behaving himself somewhat, although Ty coughed every once and awhile because Olaf would manage to blow smoke directly into his face. Anders on the other hand...

"Stop."

"Stop what?" Axl asked confused.

"You're jiggling your goddamn leg Axl." Anders muttered.

"Oh...Sorry." Axl stopped jiggling his leg.

But in a few seconds his legs started jiggling again, causing Anders to bounce slightly up and down again. "Oh my god Axl I will stab you with something if you don't stop moving your leg like that."

"I can't help it! I hate being all cramped like this!" 

Mike looked behind him, to see all four of the Johnsons in the back all wriggling in a mess and yelling at each other. The passenger seat was mostly dominated by bags of extra clothing and some of Mike's tools to help set up camp, so no one could even sit there. He turned around again sharply when he heard something hit against his seat, and he was greeted with Anders slowly sinking even more crushed in between the front seat and Axl's mile-long legs because Axl had shoved him off his lap. 

Anders looked pleadingly up at him. "Please tell me we're almost there."

Mike looked up to see Michele's car pulling into another street. "Yep. Just a couple more minutes."

Anders groaned in relief as he allowed himself to sink deeper until he finally touched the ground, crushed between the front seat and Axl's legs. As soon at the car stopped on their campsite it, the car door opened immediately allowing all the crushed Johnsons to spill out nearly at once, although Axl had to grab Anders and unstick him from the floor of the car, and he dropped him unceremoniously on the dirt. Anders stumbled to his legs.

"Oh thank god." He muttered, adjusting his sunglasses onto his eyes.

Luckily unpacking seemed to go a bit more smoothly than packing, and soon enough they had tents set up and everyone had made a run for the beach. Everyone set up towels and anything they really needed, but Anders literally just forwent doing any of that in favor of just sprinting straight into the water. Ty followed soon after, relishing in the fact that he wasn't going to be freezing the water or anyone around it, although he regretted it slightly when Anders somehow managed to catch a fish with his bare hands and hit Ty in the face with it. Damn Anders and his weird fish powers. 

Anders had swam off towards the shore to show off his prize, while Ty just allowed himself to float serenely in the water. Dawn hadn't wanted to join him, preferring instead to sit and chat with the rest of the former goddesses and taking in the sun. Ty let out a rather girly shriek when Anders popped up from nowhere, and Axl soon following. 

"How the fuck do you guys even do that?" Ty asked.

They both shrugged, and Axl had that look on his face when he and Anders cook up silly ideas. "Ty, we're going to make a bonfire!"

"...But isn't that not allowed?" Ty asked, staring at both his brothers.

Anders waved his hand at Ty. "Who the hell cares? Isn't bonfires something you're supposed to do when you have get-togethers like this? Anyways we need someone to help us collect wood in secret, because I know Mike will say no if we ask him first."

"So clearly arriving with piles of wood will make him not be able to deny us doing something illegal?"

Axl nodded excitedly. "Yep! Now hurry up!" Both Axl and Anders grabbed Ty by the arms and swam him back to shore. 

Luckily Mike had been distracted by Olaf so all three brothers went off undetected as they disappeared into the wooded area near the beach, and they were collecting any sort of wood that they could find. Ty was the one keeping watch, making sure that none of the park rangers were going to appear suddenly to tell them off, but luckily they had gone undetected, and they all went back to their beach sight with armfuls of wood. 

Mike looked up to see them making a pile of wood and he groaned. "What the hell are you three up to?" 

"Bonfire. Axl and Anders insisted." Ty replied, helping pile up the wood.

Mike rolled his eyes. "Okay, whatever. If we get caught it's your fault."

Colin had wandered his way over to the three brothers who were arguing how to properly light a bonfire, and as the sky was darkening Colin finally pushed them all out of the way and lit up the bonfire in around 10 seconds. And everyone had started to crowd around the bonfire, basking in the warmth that it was providing as the night got slightly more chilly than it had been during the day. Anders had slipped off somewhere, but only Mike seemed to notice as he looked around to see where he had gone. He was about to ask Hanna or someone when Anders had suddenly burst from the trees carrying a guitar case. He set it on the ground and pulled out the guitar, shoving it into Mike's grip.

"Come on, play something!" Anders demanded, flopping down onto the sand next to Colin, who continued to tend to the fire.

Mike flipped Anders off, but complied with his younger brother's request. He tuned the guitar for a moment, before playing a tentative melody. Olaf immediately started singing some old sea shanty that no one actually knew the words to. Olaf was enjoying himself, and everyone was chatting and roasting marshmallows and any other food that they could spear onto a stick. Mike was actually enjoying himself as he strummed on the guitar, and so he got rather pissed when Anders threw some sand at him.

"What the hell is it now Anders?"

"I've had enough of these shanties. Play something we all actually know!" 

Mike stopped playing, and thought for a moment. He then started on a much faster beat, that made Anders' eyes light up and his head bob in approval. Mike was slightly out of practice with singing, but he gave it a shot anyways.

_"Oh my god I'm beaten in the game of love, and I fall down, I fall down on my knees I fall..."_

Everyone recognized the song, and started to join in one by one, with Olaf crooning the loudest and most off-key from all of them. They all laughed at each other whenever someone failed to hit one of the notes or stumble over the lyrics that they didn't know very well.

_"I've had two years in heaven but five weeks in hell, Where do I go now? Oh my gooood! Oh my loooord!"_

They were all laughing and enjoying themselves. Singing horribly in unison and finally truly enjoying the feeling of being completely mortal again. This was definitely on experience in a lifetime to see, with Anders practically rolling on top of Colin from laughter, and Ty and Zeb throwing sand at each other. Olaf, Ingrid, and Stacey were completely all over each other, while Hanna and Dawn were enjoying their own smaller version of binge drinking with wine they had brought along. 

Mike strummed a bit slower, as they hit the final notes of the song. 

_"I'm down on my knees, and begging you please..."_


End file.
